More Than Ordinary Lives

My molar tooth developed an abscess. After a root canal, it broke off at the gum line. A dental implant was my only option.

A dental surgeon drilled a hole in my jawbone and screwed in a permanent anchor. See the X-ray.  A steel post, threaded into the anchor then provided a way to attach an artificial tooth. To my and our family dentist’s surprise, the steel post broke off leaving the threaded section in the anchor. The implanted anchor thereby became useless. Furthermore my sagging gums had covered access to the anchor. I alternated between despair and thoughts of suing the anchor manufacturer. 

But Dr. Singh is no ordinary dentist. He sent me home and promised to research the problem. A month later, having watched a procedure on YouTube, he extracted the threaded section using a special tool requested from the anchor’s manufacturer. I’ll spare you the shocking details but an electric arc was literally involved. I’ll receive a new tooth next month. 

A year ago I experienced the failure of non-cancerous prostate surgery despite a touted “98% success rate.” A newly created localized chemotherapy treatment set me right. Now I’m thanking God for highly skilled professionals and for modern medical technology. What they can do and will do in the future is amazing. 

Drew Coons

Not really Drew. Unless you count hiring a lumber jack as me felling the tree. 

A four-foot diameter hemlock died and remained precariously hovering 150 feet over our house. Western hemlocks have little rot resistance and thereby fall within a few years of dying.

I’ve cut many trees in my lifetime and know that occasionally one falls differently than you had planned.  In my thirties, I climbed and tied trees off so they could be pulled in the desirable direction. Even so, several defied expectation. This tree needed to be taken down in sections lest it land on our house.  Even on this day, a tied off dead maple, managed to confound the experts by going the opposite  direction as intended.

Wisdom includes knowing and acknowledging your limitations. Plus watching the expert take that huge hemlock down in sections was interesting.

Drew

Kit and I caught these two fish on Saturday. Mine was slightly bigger this year. But Kit caught the most, about twenty.  Our friends, Kirk and Lynn Murry, caught some nice fish too.    

We only kept two fish each in accordance with regulations. Washington’s Department of Fish and Wildlife is doing a marvelous job managing and increasing salmon harvests. The man in the picture is an officer retrieving a planted monitoring device from a fish for research purposes.

I’ll enjoy the memory of that day for the rest of my life. My hope is that you also accumulate wonderful memories.

Drew

“Well, that was fun,” said Kit.  We had just spent six hours on Saturday standing behind a table offering our novels for sale.

Although we both felt tired, I readily agreed with her because vending at markets is more than selling novels to us. We meet and chat with interesting people who frequently have compelling  experiences to share. And shoppers bring plenty of friendly dogs to outdoor markets who love the noise and activity. One young woman carried a hairless cat like a baby. The cat didn’t appreciate the commotion, and especially not the dogs, but enjoyed being cuddled.

Some people ask our advice. On this day, I helped three would-be writers. Kit coached a young couple on marriage. The previous week a young man who aspired to aeronautics lingered at our table soaking up my encouragement on becoming an engineer. His grandfather watched with approval. People seem to sense that we genuinely care about them.

At every market we return to, previous customers approach saying how much they enjoyed our novels and looking for a new one. We’ve sold nearly 7,000 printed novels now plus eBooks and audio. In every story, our characters learn valuable lessons about relationships and life. Our hope is that an interesting story and relatable characters will plant positive ideas, especially in young readers. And the printed novels are likely to circulate long after we’re gone.

Finally, I believe the massive exposure to different people is making Kit and me better, especially more empathetic. I hope every retired couple finds something as fun and meaningful to enrich their years.

Drew

As a bookworm, I read reviews.  A Marriage at Sea is a true story compiled by Sophie Elmhirst.  The story describes the experience of Maurice and Maralyn Bailey who spent 118 days adrift at sea after a chance collision with a whale sank their yacht. According to the author, they survived by relying on each other. I have not read the book but hope to.

“What else is marriage, if not being stuck on a small raft with someone and trying to survive,” writes Ms. Elmhirst.  As you may know, Kit and I spent 35 years actively strengthening marriages. Even now, our novels and articles are laced with marriage principles. Although there are many forms of marriage, our emphasis was on partnership. Ms. Elmhirst eloquently states the core of that concept.

After rescue, the Baileys embarked on another voyage of eighteen months. Apparently, the hardship overcome together had strengthened their relationship. This is an underlying theme of our non-fiction book, Better Together.

Drew

Georgia Tech’s graduate school is consistently rated third nationally only behind MIT and Cal Tech. Earlier this year Kit and I visited the campus in Atlanta on the fiftieth anniversary of my start there. Every graduate student then had finished in the top 5%  at their former universities. Everyone was used to getting A’s. But Georgia Tech had a policy of grading on a bell curve. The completion for the few A’s was brutal. Each class hour required three to five hours of preparation. That was my experience of playing in the major leagues of what I did best. I remain proud that I finished with a 4.0.

Opps!  I just admitted to having pride. Pride has been called one of the “Seven Deadly Sins.” Pride is taboo to many people especially those who are devout. And I think that pride in oneself as being inherently better than others is wrong and dangerous. But I also think pride in an accomplishment or a job well done is positive. Galatians 6:4  in the Bible says, “Each one should test their own actions. Then they can take pride in themselves alone, without comparing themselves to someone else.”

Pride in our own actions can sustain us during difficulties or when affirmation is scarce.  My goal is to act in such a way that I can be proud of my actions thereafter.

Drew Coons

Between tree gaps, Kit and I saw two symmetrical objects with flat bottoms and rounded tops hovering above Mt. Rainer. Sadly, like other UFO spotters, we did not get a photo. Driving on the interstate at the time would have made that dangerous.

However, such sightings are regular in Washington. The picture shown is one displayed by Mt. Rainier National Park. Our two smaller objects, no less  unworldly, weren’t stacked and glowed white against a clear blue sky. A pilot, Kenneth Arnold, first reported them in 1947—a good year for UFOs—and likened them to “flying saucers.” The name stuck and became synonymous with extraterrestrial visitation.

The phenomena is caused by waves in the atmosphere that form when moist air flow is forced up, over and partway down a mountaintop. The moist air cools, causing it to condense into a disk-shaped cloud. In Washington, they are considered a harbinger of rain. Mt. Rainier is a perfect spot. At 14,411 feet, it towers alone over a relatively flat countryside of only about 400 feet.

Sadly we didn’t see a UFO. But we’re still trying and hoping. Makes life more fun.

Drew

Kit keeps taking my clothes. When asked about their whereabouts, she brightly responds, “I’m washing them for you.”

“Don’t you know that clothes have a limited number of washes in them? And you never know when a sock won’t come back,” I say. Kit rolls her eyes.

I explain my grading system for the umpteenth time. “#1 just washed. #2 worn less than eight times. #3 slightly soiled, #4 really dirty, #5 this does need to be washed.”

Kit responds with a rather sexist remark. “Only a male would say that.”

“You only have two grades,” I rebut. “#1 just washed and #2 worn once now needs washing.”

Kit walks away shaking her head. Do you suppose the reason women buy so many new clothes is because they wear them out washing? 

Drew

Pictured is the heading from our More Than Ordinary Lives website. The underlying theme to our writing is people perceived as ordinary doing extraordinary things because of their persistence and decisions rather than innate superior ability.

In 2017, prior to the release of our first novels, Kit and I learned we would need a website. All I knew about websites was how to open one by clicking. We sought professional website designers. But in an amazing insight, I realized that hiring an expert would make us dependent on him to manage it and make changes. Therefore, this old man spent a hundred hours learning how. The result is a non-spectacular but functional and useful website.

The problem is that our website host has not remained static during the last eight years. They are constantly evolving their services.  In technology, 2017 is ancient times. Things I knew how to do no longer work. Try getting a person to talk to. Their automated help, powered by AI, is frustrating because describing your problem in a few words can be impossible. And, as I’ve pointed out before, AI frequently gives you steps that are no longer available.

During a recent problem that stymied me, I used more-than-ordinary persistence to get to a live person online. To the company’s credit, he patiently waited an hour while I tried his remedies on a split screen. Finally, he asked, “Did you double-click rather than single click on the picture?”  It worked!  I apologized for being an idiot. But the rep corrected me. “It used to be a single click. Our designers changed it to double click.”

I didn’t need to ask, “How was I supposed to know that?”  He expressed understanding my frustration. Knowing it wasn’t his fault, I gave him a stellar rating afterwards.

Nearly every technology we need for operating in 2025 is constantly changing. I feel like I’ve become its slave.

Drew

Recently I spent several hours online trying to pay property taxes a week before the deadline. The County Treasurer’s website acted erratically and refusing to recognize me by account number, address, or name. Finally, after probably twenty attempts I connected, paid by electric funds transfer, and received confirmation.

A few days later, I received an email informing me that my payment had failed and accessing a $35 fine. Already incensed by their erratic website, I strongly suspected the error wasn’t my fault. But I went to the Treasurers office and paid by paper check, including the fine. Over the following few days, I could not shake feelings of aggrievement. I alternated between imagining myself stating my case in court and telling myself, “$35 isn’t worth all that trouble.”

Where do you draw the line at being gipped? Of course the amount matters. But being cheated on even small amounts can rankle nearly anyone. In this case, I remembered Jesus’ admonitions to “go another mile” and “turn the other cheek.” That helped . . . some. I decided that the line is where others might be victimized.

I wrote to the Treasurer reporting that their website might be imperfect. At Kit’s suggestion, I politely asked that my fine be waived. I did my duty and, thanks to Kit, got a refund of my fine.  I’m still not certain where the line to take action is. But I know that the wrong thing for me personally is to allow a grievance to spoil my days.

Drew